About me
About me
So, I am 25 years old and I’m Norwegian. This tumblr is supposed to be anonymous, so I won’t follow anyone that my friends can not know about. I have still saved a lot of people in a hidden bookmark folder, so I can “follow” you guys still.
I’ve struggled with my weight my whole life. When I got 13, I really started to feel I needed to diet. And I found the “PASS” internet society. It stands for “pro ana suicide society”, which is kind of a stupid name. At least now it does. I still go there sometimes, because it’s the only place I know that I can be honest.
Over the years, I’ve lost weight and gained it again. My first highest weight was 73kg (160lbs). I lost 10 kg (~20lbs) in some months by eating as little as possible. I felt empowered and happy. I still managed to lose more, and got to 60kg (130lbs). Then I guess there was a summer vacation or something and I gained back 5kg (10lbs). The next few years was ups and down, but I guess the average was 140lbs. And then the last few years has not been very good. I’ve reached my highest weight three times, increasing it every time. I’ve lost 10-20lbs every time, and then gained it all back. I’m fed up with it, and this final time my highest weight isn’t far from 170lbs.
SO. How can I convince anyone, and myself, that this time will be the one?
Basically I can not. But I’ll keep on trying, even though I fail really often. I am a really bad example of a diet blog, but I’ll still write here when I am trying. It’s an ongoing struggle and right now I don’t have time for healthy weight loss because I have messed up so much. I need to feel okay for the summer. I won’t be able to feel great, because there’s no time to lose enough. Last summer was horrible and I DON’T want to rush through another summer, wishing it was over so I could hide in bigger clothes again.
Basically, now in August 2011, I’m at the same place as when I wrote this. I’ll never give up though!
And now. April 2012. Same stuff.
